I’ve given up smoking now for more than two years. That’s not to say I didn’t have a couple of ‘naughty’ odd puffs here and there along the way in the first year, but these days, I’m smoke free. Most of the time I feel pretty good about that. I’ve saved an enormous amount of money, my children and husband are very happy and my health is much improved.
Regardless, in the last month – (yes, I blame FEB FAST!!) – I suddenly and inexplicably started feeling like smoking again.
Perhaps it was being with friends who smoke socially? Perhaps it was because I wasn’t drinking alcohol that I was looking for something else that qualified as ‘naughty’? Whatever the reason, I was seriously weighing up the pros and cons of perhaps just smoking socially – and we all know where that leads – when I came across an anti-smoking ad.
This may be old news to some of you, but I hadn’t seen it until yesterday. And how timely.
It’s one of the most powerful anti-smoking messages I’ve seen. Such a beautiful teenager, vibrant and full of life, Terri had her first cigarette at 13 and became a full-time smoker at just 17. First diagnosed with oral cancer at the age of 40, she then survived ten cancer diagnoses before succumbing to an 11th – after a year of chemo – at the age of 53.
Terri spent much of her last years travelling across the United States speaking to adults and teenagers about the dangers of smoking.
Her message is still coming through loud and strong.
I cannot tell you how much happier I am this week, now that FEB FAST is FINALLY over. THANK GOD. Fletch and I celebrated over the weekend, starting with dinner at a Japanese restaurant on Saturday night where I ordered a JAPANESE MOJITO. I’d never heard of a Japanese mojito before, so I ordered it because I could and it was FABULOUS. Then late on Sunday we left the kids at home and wandered down to a nearby wine bar, which led to a pub-crawl on pubic transport to most of the liquor establishments within a five-kilometre distance of home. It was silly, juvenile and FUN. We even took SELFIES. (The kids will be SOoooo embarrassed.)
I’m not saying FEB FAST was all bad. It just wasn’t exactly a fun-filled month. I’m glad I did it to prove that I CAN survive without alcohol, but I don’t think I’ll do it again. I did one of those lists – pros versus cons – to weigh up its appeal: The Good Stuff about Feb Fast: 1. Time goes veeeerrrrrryyyy slowly… If you’re one of those people who always complains about time moving too quickly, DO Feb Fast and you’ll be amazed. It might be the shortest month of the year, but, but God, it will feel like the longest… 2. You save quite a bit of money. Probably because you don’t want to go out much because you can’t drink, you stay at home. You don’t spend money at bars, restaurants, or taxis OR shout all your friends drinks when you’ve had too much… 3. You meet all your work deadlines EARLY because there’s nothing much else to do… The Bad Stuff about Feb Fast: 1. It’s VERY, very boring. 2. You DO NOT lose weight. This was THE most disappointing aspect of Feb Fast. I should have listened to Linda, my hair colourist, who told me this would be the case and I didn’t believe her. But it’s true. When deprived of wine, you adopt the crazy rationale of, ‘Gee, I’m not drinking, so of course I can have that three kilo block of chocolate!’ Which goes to prove that you should ALWAYS listen to your hairdresser. 3. You don’t see your friends as much. Because you’d rather not join them at the pub where everyone is laughing and drinking while you stand there with a soda water feeling as bitter and twisted as the floating lemon in your glass. 4. There’s nothing to look forward to at the end of the day. Not that I drink EVERY day, but even the possibility is more pleasant than a definitive NO. 5. There’s nothing to ease the pain of a crappy day. 6. Did I mention that it’s very boring? See? I told you. It’s not worth it. And now I’ve now finished FEB FAST, I’m going to have to think about getting back on some kind of diet because I sure as hell ate more than my fair quota of chocolate over the last month.
At a recent girls lunch, I caught up with Emma the Guru (you may remember, Emma owns/produces THE MUESLI, which has no added sugar) and was again reminded of how important it is to cut sugar from our diets. Emma is proof. She’s consistently one of the slimmest of my friends and is not a yo-yo dieter at all. (bit annoying really… ) So when I went to the supermarket today, I started checking labels again. One product that’s very hard to find with low sugar content is TOMATO PASTE. Often I’ll buy home brand products but here’s proof why it pays to spend a few pennies more on a labelled brand.
And LEGGO’S contains 9.8 per cent per 100 grams. So even though I can’t seem to find a tomato paste that fits the UNDER FIVE PER CENT sugar rule, Leggo’s wins. And when it’s a product we use all the time and is a pantry staple, I thought it was worth pointing out. And spending the extra twenty cents on. Pay less, get more sugar. Food for thought indeed. If you have any tips about low-sugar content products, please let me know!
If you’re anything like me – obsessed with movies – then you’ll be pretty excited about the Academy Awards coming up early next week. That’s March 2nd in the U.S. but Monday, March 3rd for those of us in Australia.
The time difference presents a minor dilemma – watch it live at lunchtime or enforce a social media blackout – then have friends over that evening to watch it at night with a glass of wine. Which is a lot more fun.
I’m predicting it will be a sensational evening, not only because of the brilliant line-up of movies and actors vying for awards, but because the night is to be hosted by the witty and fabulous Ellen DeGeneres. And that’s GOT to be better than last years host Seth MacFarlane (comedy guy and creator of Family Guy) who stirred up quite a bit of controversy with his politically incorrect comments. And from all reports, he’d rather stick needles in his eye than go through such pressure again. Phew.
The next dilemma is trying to cram in actually watching as many Oscar-nominated films as you can before the big night, because of course, it will be that much more interesting if you and your friends can debate who is the most worthy recipient of each category.
I’ve done pretty well this year and have already seen ‘The Wolf of Wall Street’, ‘Her’, ‘American Hustle’, ‘Gravity, ‘Dallas Buyers Club’ and ‘Philomena’. And only last night I watched ’12 Years A Slave’. I missed out on ‘Captain Phillips’ at the cinema but may still squeeze in a viewing of ‘Nebraska’ before the weekend’s out.
I’m not going to give you a review of each – rather three words that for me, sums them up best.
1. The Wolf Of Wall Street – Entertaining, pacy and morally bankrupt.
2. 12 Years a Slave – Heart wrenching, powerful and beautifully tragic.
3. Gravity – Suspenseful, unique and a little slow.
4. Her – Surprisingly believable, touching and fascinating.
5. American Hustle – Fast, entertaining and a costume extravaganza. (too much of Amy Adam’s breasts!!)
6. Dallas Buyers Club – Gritty, a brilliant script and performances, outstanding cinematography.
7. Philomena – Poignant, another great script and highly emotional.
As you can guess, yes, I really enjoyed them all. In particular, 12 Years A Slave, Dallas Buyers Club and The Wolf of Wall Street. But if I were to hand over the Oscar on the night, I’d have to give it to 12 Years A Slave. Interesting, isn’t it, that all three of these movies are based on real life stories?
And just for the record, I’d give the Best Actor award to Matthew McConaughey in Dallas Buys Club (his physical transformation was astounding, as well as his performance) and to Sandra Bullock for Gravity. (Or Cate Blanchett in Blue Jasmine.But then again, what about Meryl’s brilliance in August Osage County? Hmm, that’s a toughie…)
I’d also hand Best Director to Martin Scorese for The Wolf of Wall Street. Even though the subject matter isn’t as visually appealing as the panoramic landscapes in 12 Years A Slave, it’s how he succeeds in making a mere office scene impactful and creative that shows off his genius.
So hurry up – you’ve only got four and a half days left to cram in some great quality movie viewing. Let me know which of the Oscar nominated films would win your vote?
It’s a wonder we get anything done on weekends at all. I mean, there’s so much reading to be done. First, there’s the Saturday newspapers and all the extra lift-outs featuring your favourite columnists, like Wendy Tuohy at the Herald Sun. Also from the Herald Sun, Anna Byrne’s fab fashion overview never fails to give me the shopping bug and I can’t put the paper down without scanning Leigh Paatsch’s movie reviews. Plus I’m a big fan of The Age Weekend mag.
Special mention goes to Leigh Paatsch this week for his line about John Jarratt’s performance in the newly released Wolf Creek 2. I can’t remember when I last read such a beautifully scathing sentence: “As for John Jarratt, watching him reel off his repertoire of guttural grunts and wince-worthy wisecracks is like being trapped on a crowded train next to a drunk, disturbed circus clown.” OUCH.
Having seen the movie myself at a special preview screening last Wednesday night, I can’t say I felt as strongly about Jarratt’s performance. Neither would I agree with Paatch’s half a star rating for the movie. Yes, Jarratt’s performance does seem slightly ill-fitting in some moments with it’s comedic bent, but on the whole he is a terrifying and believably insane serial killer.The movie itself does artfully manage to create nail-biting suspense and definitely delivers on the believable gore and vicious torture front. I’d give it two and a half stars.
Just for the record, horror is not my favourite movie genre, but I have a teen daughter who IS a big fan, so I succumbed to pressure and went along. Veronica loved the film and completely disregards any negative reviews, firm in her belief that the genre of horror does not win the respect it deserves. Each to their own.
But I digress. Back to all that weekend reading I was talking about… As well as newspapers, I’ve just discovered a fantastic Blog site that encompasses all the most popular Blogs in one spot. Called Blog Lovin’, this means you can quite easily whittle away a couple of hours in front of your laptop without noticing. Dangerous stuff. But highly entertaining. So if you’re on the look out for some new and entertaining reading, check out Blog Lovin’. You can sign up so you receive regular updates from your Bloggers without trawling through the internet too. So there’s a time saver for you to boot. Sort of…
Singer, actor, celebrity, charity worker – as if there weren’t enough strings to her bow, the beautiful Tottie Goldsmith has now added another. Several months ago, she became a qualified marriage celebrant.
Chatting with Tottie in her recently renovated bayside apartment, it’s clear this is a year of fresh beginnings – a new home, a new career and a revitalised trajectory for The Chantoozies, who are launching a new song and video clip.
But more about that later. Let’s start with the most recent career development – becoming a marriage celebrant.
What was it that inspired Tottie to be the one who blesses couples exchanging matrimonial vows? ‘Three people suggested it to me,’ said Tottie. ‘I’ve always had this belief that if you get a message from the universe three times, you must act on it. The first person to suggest it was my Dad, the second was a producer and the third was my sister-in-law. So I figured I’d better do something about it.’
But it wasn’t as simple as Tottie imagined. ‘The course isn’t easy at all. I wanted to get it over with as soon as possible but it took about seven months on-line and I worked at it constantly – even when travelling. But then the course I was studying with lost their accreditation so I had to sit for it again through the Attorney General’s office.’
That didn’t deter Tottie. She persisted, started from scratch, studied hard, graduated and then finally had cause to celebrate when she was granted her licence. ‘It was a really exciting day. I felt I’d achieved something. Just seeing the certificate with my name on it made me feel really proud. The first wedding I did, when I first said the words, “I’m a civil celebrant authorised by law to solemnise marriages according to the law in Australia,” it felt extraordinary.’
Performing a marriage ceremony comes naturally to Tottie. ‘It’s an incredible thing and I’m so glad I did the course.’ she said. ‘It really suits me. I love people, I love being involved in this sensitive but happy time and the response I’m getting from people is fantastic. I almost become a part of the family and I’m really honoured to be part of such a special time in their lives.’
Initially Tottie meets with the betrothed couple to see if they have the ‘right vibe’ between them and to talk about how the couple wants the ceremony to proceed. Then she sends them some ideas in an email with a template of how she thinks the couple might like the service to run. ‘I also like to see them a couple of times before the wedding to make sure we’ve covered everything and then we have a rehearsal.’
So was she nervous before conducting her first wedding four months ago? ‘I was a little, but because I’ve done so much MC work, I knew I’d be fine. I also rehearsed with a couple of friends of mine who played the bride and groom to practice the technical stuff – like when to pass the rings and juggle the microphone and it was all fine.’
Tottie is also a big supporter of gay marriage and is hopeful she’ll be able to conduct weddings for gay couples in the future. ‘In my family, I have a gay cousin and a gay aunt and their relationships are just as deep and profound as anyone else’s. Love is not gender specific. Really decent deep people rise above gender when it comes to love so I think that’s also a place in the market where I’ll be able to work well.’
A surprising twist to Tottie’s new career is that she’s also recently been asked to conduct funerals by families who don’t hold specific religious beliefs, but want a spiritual send-off for loved ones.
‘I was asked to do this,’ said Tottie, ‘I told the family I’d find someone else more suitable but they insisted they wanted me. It was an incredibly profound experience to sit with these people and talk with them about this woman I’d never met, but I felt I really knew her by the time we’d finished. Sitting with this family was an honour. I then went home and wrote up a condensed version of what everyone told me. We also talked about what music to play and how to structure the service, so it’s actually quite creative too.’
Like weddings, performing the funeral service was equally rewarding. ‘The woman who hired me rang the next day and said, “That was perfect. The whole family loved you. I think this is your calling.” I was really moved by this and it did feel right. Because I lost my Mum so recently, I really ‘got it’ and was sensitive to what they needed. I want to provide a safe, comfortable place for these people who are grieving.’
Of course the only problem for Tottie now is juggling her new vocation with her already established career as a singer. Especially as her band, The Chantoozies, has had a resurgence of popularity in the past year, meaning her calendar is heavily booked. With many weddings taking place on weekends, at the same time most venues want the band, how is she going to manage to continue doing both?
‘It will be tricky,’ she said. ‘There’s one day coming up where I’ve got a wedding at 2pm, then we drive out to a vineyard and I’ll have to get changed in the backseat ready to perform on stage. In one instance, I had to turn down a Chantoozies gig to do a wedding and in another instance, I turned down a wedding to do a music gig. So yes, it’s a juggle.’
But at the moment, the band takes priority. The Chantoozies are preparing to shoot a film clip for a new single they’re about to release so all Tottie’s energy is going in to that.
I’d love to tell you more about the new song, but Tottie says she’s sworn to secrecy. ‘We made a public declaration and put it on Facebook that we’d have a new single out by the end of March. It might be early April at this stage, but after having made such a big announcement, we’re determined to follow through with it.’
Tottie says she and her three fellow band members are all close friends. They don’t have management, because after so many years in the business and knowing each other’s strengths, they don’t need it. ‘We work really well together, ‘ said Tottie. ‘We’ve go an incredible sisterhood and an incredible work ethic and we’re better than any management team out there.’
So what does Tottie hope will happen with her song? ‘I’m hoping Smooth FM at least will pick it up. And other radio stations. I’m hoping the film clip goes viral, because it has an essence to it that could go viral and I’m hoping that once we get more attention, the venues will pay us double the money and we’ll have double the fun!’
Tottie said a recent session with a life coach made her realise just how important The Chantoozies are in her life. ‘If somebody said to me, you’ll never be able to sing with The Chantoozies again, I’d be devastated. It means that much to me. It’s that much fun. If we haven’t done a gig for ten days and I go to sound check and I’m on stage with my best friends surrounded by music that we love and it all pulls together and it happens, then I feel happy!’
‘There’s a lot going on right now, but I’m looking forward to all of it. It’s going to be a good year,’ said Tottie. Her smile says it all.
If you’d like to know more about Tottie’s work as a singer, actor or celebrant, check out her website which is at: www.tottiegoldsmith.com.au
