Even after centuries years of marriage, I sometimes still have cause to look at Fletch in amazement, shake my head and say ‘Really? Seriously? I mean, you REALLY, even now, still don’t GET me?’
I mean, he couldn’t understand me, could he? Not when I only find out LAST NIGHT that while he was swanning around at the British TV Awards last week he met and had a photograph with MR BIG. Yes… THE Mr Big, of Sex and the City fame. AND he FORGOT to tell me!!!
Mr Big (aka Chris Noth) and Fletch at the British Soap Awards
How in a zillion years could you forget to relate such a momentous meeting?
Me, who has always been such a HUGE Sex and The City fan. Me, who has the entire box set of every series, who adores Sarah Jessica Parker, who aspired to be my own version of Carrie and who obsessed over Mr Big for years?
Not even a phone call on the night? He could have passed the phone to my fantasy beloved and we could finally have had a REAL conversation??
Seriously peeved. But that’s fine. He can have a ball, kicking up his heels with the rich and famous in London… because I can make my own fun. And I will. I’m heading off to a winery now for a VERY long lunch. Let’s see how that goes….
(And yes, I have AGAIN failed to stick to my Blogging schedule as today was SUPPOSED to be Fashion Friday Blog, but I needed to vent. In fact, I think a signature of my Blogs will be the footnotes at the end of each story, explaining and justifying WHY I haven’t stuck to my own Grand Plan, yet again. And again. Well, the art of rationalisation is something to be admired, isn’t it??)
Ah, the best laid plans of mice and men… I had to find out where that saying actually came from this morning as I sat down to explain the irony of my GRAND PLAN gone wrong. Turns out it was from way, WAY back – from a poem by Robert Burns, called ‘To a Mouse’, that he penned in 1786.
Yes, on Tuesday I put a Blog out to the world, declaring how organised and reliable a Blogger I was going to become – with different themed stories for each day. And while I stated clearly I was never intending to Blog EVERY day, I had hoped to keep to the schedule for…hmmm… well… I guess, at least a week or two.
But NO, let’s just kick that plan to the ground and stomp it into smithereens on DAY ONE shall we? Why not, dear stomach? Why not take on a terrible bug that makes me so ill I can barely move from my bed? Thank God I was at least well enough before it really took hold, to get to a hair colouring session with Linda, (who I Blogged about last week), because God knows she’s so booked up I might not have gotten another appointment till Christmas…
Then I came home and fell in a heap. With legs heavy as lead, I collapsed into bed and you don’t want to know the rest. Suffice to say it involved the bathroom and it wasn’t pretty. And then I slept. And slept.
The irony being that I WAS going to write about healthy stuff today – Thursday being my self-appointed Blogging day for fitness, recipes and diet tips – but who am I to dish out advice, feeling like this?
I will offer one piece of advice though. Earlier in the year I blogged about trying the ‘Sugar Free’ diet. Which, on my terms, meant I was allowed to eat anything that had five per cent or less sugar, plus wine. (in moderation!) I was proud of myself for lasting more than six weeks and I felt great. But since ditching this concept, largely due to laziness, I reckon the old bod has taken a turn for the worse. Not only in terms of putting on a few kilos (AGAIN!) but in terms of general well-being and feeling good about the world.
And you know what? Just before I got knocked down by this tummy bug, I had a MASSIVE chocolate binge. Yep, a few layers from a block of Cadbury Crunchie chocolate topped up by half a pack of these little buggers. Chocolate bullets. And they hit their target. Not long after, it was all downhill.
See? Sugar really is Sweet Poison. I’m getting back on that health kick thingie pronto. I must make another plan…
I was thrilled to see a girlfriend’s name pop up on the mobile this morning and very much enjoyed our half hour chat. Especially as it’s been a bit of a bugbear for me lately that people just AREN’T making the effort when it comes to communication.
We lead such busy lives, that often it’s easier to just send a text or an email. But nothing beats a REAL conversation. Dry words on an electric device just don’t carry the same depth and meaning and can often lead to mis-communication.
Take this example last week when I received a text message from a girlfriend in the UK after she spied Fletch making an appearance on a TV show over there.
‘No email, no text. He just turns up on Loose Women. Don’t worry about us. We’ll be Okay.’
Wow – my eyebrows to nearly hit the ceiling. My first reaction was – ‘Of course, she’s joking.’ But what if she wasn’t? What if she was genuinely offended we hadn’t let her know Fletch was heading over there?
And that’s the problem with text messages – there’s no TONE in them. We can’t hear the sarcasm, the dry irony, the jesting voice – and that’s where the miscommunication comes in. Luckily in this instance our lovely friend was OF COURSE joking, but it did give me cause for a few unsettled moments until we clarified the issue.
Likewise, I’ve been told by a few friends lately that I need to be a better blogging communicator – that I need to have a BLOG PLAN so that readers know what to expect from this website. They want a clearer picture of what’s coming up on which day.
Point taken. I get that. And especially as you may have noticed some new advertising at the top and bottom of these posts, I’m aiming to put in more effort to make this magazine-style Blog a more professional venture.
A promise to my readers to kick off with – I vow NEVER to allow POP-UP advertising on this website. I abhor those.
I can’t promise to post a Blog every day – (even Fletch thinks that’s overkill) – but I’ll try to stick to a certain theme or topic for each day of the week. So the Blog Plan I propose is this:
MONDAY – A feature interview or opinion piece on a topical issue
TUESDAY – A light-hearted look at life or a family story
WEDNESDAY – Beauty tips or a review of the latest products
THURSDAY – Health forum, dietary advice and recipes
FRIDAY – Fashion review and Internet shopping tips
SATURDAY AND SUNDAY – Most likely rest days, but if I’ve been to a fun social event, I’ll post pics here and call it The Social Pages.
SO that’s the plan. Stay tuned to see how it pans out. But right now, isn’t there someone you need to phone?
If you’re anything like me, then the mere thought of visiting that massive maze IKEA, leaves you reaching for the whiskey bottle. I’d rather watch Tony Abbott attempting a Baywatch sprint along the beach in his budgie smugglers than go anywhere near the place. (Actually, that might be overstating it a tad…)
Past experience has taught me that you never escape IKEA in less than two hours, by which stage you’re tearing your hair out with frustration after getting stuck in the maze that is its furniture display area, fighting through harried crowds of similarly frustrated customers, then arriving home with a load of junk you never intended buying and swearing you’ll never go back. It’s even worse than trying to shop at an Aldi supermarket.
Fletch with fellow Neighbours actors Saskia Hampele
With Fletch being in the UK, I decided to freshen up his office to surprise him on his return. (It’s okay – he’s on a plane now so won’t read this before getting home.) After much research, the best option for a new rug – taking price, size and colour into account – was… sadly… IKEA.
A bit unfair when you think about it. He flies overseas, swanning around presenting prizes at the British Soap Awards while I get stuck with a visit to IKEA.
But the desire to renovate was stronger than my IKEA-phobia, so I decided not to let the place defeat me. I’d make a cunning plan and come out tops.
And GUESS WHAT? The plan actually WORKED!! I managed to get in and out of that vast wasteland of consumerism in FIFTEEN MINUTES. I was very up myself about this record-breaking feat, so tweeted the fact and was met with a big reaction – meaning LOTS of you guys related to the trauma of an IKEA visit. So I thought it best to Blog my tips to help you all when you next take the plunge.
IKEA SURVIVAL TIPS
1. Do your research before heading to the store. Jump on the Internet and work out which items you need and write down the details. Then phone the store to check they are in stock.
2. Do not take small children with you.
3. Wear runners – not heels – you need to make some quick crowd-busting moves.
4. Try to plan your trip mid-week when fewer customers will be vying for attention from sales staff.
5. Accost the front-of-store help-person on arrival to verify the location of the goods you’re looking for. If you’re in luck, you can TAKE A SHORT CUT and head straight to the MARKET HALL section, by-passing the entire furniture display area. This will save you at least half an hour. I was in luck yesterday as all I needed was a rug.
6. If you can’t see your item immediately, accost another sales person to help you otherwise you’ll waste precious time wandering around.
7. DO NOT STOP to look at any other items that grab your attention. They are NOT on your list. STICK TO YOUR LIST.
8. When you have all your items, head to the self-checkout service section, which is much, MUCH quicker than queuing for a checkout assistant to process your purchases.
And what a difference the rug made to Fletch’s office. Just over a year ago, we’d rearranged rooms and somehow, he’d ended up with an old faded, stained pink rug that used to be in Veronica’s room when she was little. Well past it’s use-by date…
What an improvement! A clean, cream rug to lighten up a dull space. And it was on sale too.
And in case you’re wondering, yes, that is a spare bed in his office. Just in case he’s in the doghouse or snoring too loudly. A girl’s got to be prepared…
That was also brought home by an embarrassing visit to the dentist this morning. As I lay back in the recliner chair, I noticed a newly designed courtyard outside the facing window of the surgery. It’s a pretty white-pebbled and ferny space; a pleasant distraction from the painful work going on inside one’s mouth.
‘Gee, you built that quickly,’ I remarked. ‘That wasn’t here last time.’
‘Ah, no, it wasn’t that quick,’ said Christine, looking at me as though I was one snag short of a barbie. ‘You haven’t been here for two years.’
TWO YEARS? Are you kidding? I felt like I’d been woken from a coma. Usually I visit the dentist every six months like clockwork. It occurred to me two weeks ago that I hadn’t received a reminder notice for a while, so made this appointment without being prompted. I thought maybe a year at most had passed – probably less than a year – so I was staggered to find out it was in fact, more than TWO YEARS. How slack! Or was I sub-consciously avoiding something I dislike intensely?
The ‘time whizzing past’ concept also reminded me I haven’t posted a New Year’s Resolution update for more than three months. As I said in the last update all those moons ago, I was beginning to find them repetitive to write on a WEEKLY basis, which meant they must have been boring to read, so decided to take a short break. Which became a longish break…
Now it’s definitely time for an update, so here’s how those resolutions are looking nearly five months down the track:
NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION UPDATE
(1) Sugar free challenge (apart from wine) – HA, HA, HA and HA! Hmmm… yes, I was starting to fall off the wagon at the end of six weeks and things haven’t improved since. To be honest, I ate a Crunchie bar for breakfast this morning. So NOT GOOD. I love the concept, though, and would like to tackle this again, but on a less extreme level.
Regardless, I will keep eating The Muesli for breakfast most days – except when there’s a Crunchie Bar lying around.
I felt great (and lost weight!) when I gave up sugar, but there were too many treats I missed – sharing chocolate with my daughter while watching a DVD, buying a fruit bun down the street while doing the food shop and ICE-CREAM.
Now I’ve come across a new diet – which includes a lot of GREEN JUICE – and I’ll share that with you next week. It also involves some tips from the Crazy, Sexy Diet book by Kris Carr, which is well worth a read.
After much research, I’ve even bought a whiz bang juicer and will give you the low-down on which is the best on the market and why, next week.
(2) Not to play I-Phone Games – I failed on this one too. I went through a downer-patch in Feb/March and resorted to playing games as a mind-numbing way of blocking out the bad stuff. I suppose it’s better than taking drugs.
(3) To tidy my office before the end of March – And again, I laugh. Not because I failed, but because I COMPLETELY FORGOT this one. I have managed to clear a mass of paperwork piles from the floor, but the desk still looks like a tsunami’s hit.
(4) To go to the gym at least 3 times a week – At last – a tick! YES!!! For a short while I was inspired by my new trainer, Ross, who I Blogged about. Then Ross left for another gym, so now I’m doing classes instead. Which I like. In fact, this week I have been to a Spin Class (stationary group bike-riding) three times already. Yay, me. It helps to combat that sugar addiction.
(5) To NEVER smoke another cigarette again – Another tick. Big back pat. It really does get easier all the time. Especially when you pass the one-year mark. This is my biggest achievement and even though I was slightly tempted on a recent girls’ night, I stayed strong.
I don’t think I’d be surviving as many spin classes if I was still a smoker and the financial saving is also a huge bonus.
So overall, I’ve scored two out of five. Which doesn’t say a lot about my willpower. Or are New Year’s Resolutions pointless? Did you make any this year? Have you stuck to them? I’d love to hear your stories in our comments section.
