You’d think that would have been enough public humiliation for husband Fletch to give up his addiction to Internet shopping site Catch of the Day – but NOOooooo…
Only last week, another domestic appliance arrived to clutter up the laundry cupboard. (In case you were wondering, that was the last time he used that useless steam mop.)
Not just ANY ironing board. It’s a REVOLUTIONARY SPLIT ADJUSTABLE IRONING BOARD!! Well, that’s what they called it on Catch of the Day’s website.
Apparently, having two ‘arms’ instead of just ONE plank to iron on, helps save time and energy, makes ironing an absolute joy and sends masses of endorphins pumping through your veins. I wish. Ironing would have to be my most hated domestic chore, so I would have welcomed something to ease the pain, but this device doesn’t do anything of the sort.
In fact, contrary to its claims, it’s a complete and utter piece of crap. I tried it. Shirtsleeves do not fit over the arms – like it claims – because they are too fat. The clamp in the middle takes twice as long to hold a collar in it to iron than doing the damn thing in the old-fashioned way, PLUS it’s a good metre shorter than the old faithful ironing board that we’ve had for twelve years and never had a problem with in the first place.
But the ‘piece de resistance’ of this contraption, is what happens when you put the arms together for ironing. Instead of a SMOOTH plank, you have a crevice down the middle, so that anything you attempt to iron ends up looking MORE crumpled than when you began. It’s hilarious that anyone could have thought this would be a good idea in the first place.
You might think I’m being unreasonable and ungrateful, but I challenge you to try one yourself. Actually, don’t. You’d just be wasting your hard-earned cash. And I am appreciative that Fletch thinks these gadgets can in some way make life in the Fletcher household rosier, but I’m of the view that we need to start getting RID of STUFF, rather than accumulating MORE.
Like the useless Beldray steam mop, I placed the said crappy ironing board in his office for him to ‘RETURN TO SENDER’. No such luck. It’s found a home next to the steam mop, on top of the ever-growing chaos inside our laundry cupboard.
So please, Fletch, NO MORE Catch of the Day super specials. And can you book a hard rubbish collection before Christmas???
